DnD Game 1 (1,726 views)

[Bankz]

Heebs is such a pussy. Came at the boss twice and couldn't get the job done. What a fucking Nerd

[eric]

per text, Duc moves behind Bankz
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Account Deleted] storms up on Lazy Pete, provoking an attack of opportunity
pete rolls 18 + 8 on his attack roll against 21 AC = hit!
Pete's mighty blade takes a chunk out of JHB for 10 damage!
JHB responds with a quick flick of his hammer...
JHB rolls 17 + 8 on his attack roll against 18 AC = hit!
...crumpling Pete's nose for 6 damage!

The two brawlers glare at each other as the crowd exults!



[Account Deleted] you still have the option of moving
you can move freely to any of the red dotted squares, because you stay engaged with pete
to move to any of the blue dotted squares you have to disengage, which provokes an attack of opportunity
and if you move to any of the red striped squares you get hit by pete AND timpig, so probably don't do that

[Bankz]

gosh darn it Duc.

We are playing with a handicap

[eric]

alright fam, good first day.

i have jury duty tomorrow so i probably won't be on at all until the evening.

FectaDEEZ you've got next move after jhb, so feel free to leave that and i'll run it when i get back

[[Account Deleted]]

Move left one space

[BKay Jewelers]

Aug 2, 2017 18:34:36 GMT -6 eric said:

alright fam, good first day.

i have jury duty tomorrow so i probably won't be on at all until the evening.

FectaDEEZ you've got next move after jhb, so feel free to leave that and i'll run it when i get back

Fucking Christ they have autonomous jurors now!?

[Heynong Man]

Sorry about yesterday guys I got called last minute to go play 18 at a local country club with college buddies then went and drank beer didn't have the chance to follow along and make moves

[eric]

Fecta slithers and sneaks his way up to the unwitting TimPig and explodes from the "shadows" with a furious two fisted assault!
fecta rolls 12 + 1 + 5 against 15 AC = hit!
fecta rolls 2 + 1 + 5 on his other attack roll = miss!

Fecta buries his sword to the hilt in the weak point of Tim's armor!
Blood fountains across the sand as Fecta withdraws his sword with a flourish, more than making up for how lame his miss with the dagger was!
18 damage!

Timpig reels from the attack but can't shake the taunt from SPL, and lunges for the Irishman!
tim rolls 8 + 8 against 16 AC = hit!
Tim's blood does not sit lonely for long as his dancing blade skewers SPL in the forearm!
6 damage!

.

Tim, you are character Z. You can use a move action now if you want, but no matter where you move you will incur at least one attack of opportunity so I don't recommend it.

[TimPig]

In that case, I will choose not to move.

[eric]

Lazy Pete you are character y



you CAN move into fecta's zone of hurt without provoking an attack of opportunity because he is already engaged in combat
however, you can't leave jhb's zone of hurt or he will get one on you
you will also get a flanking bonus if you attack fecta, which makes it easier to hit him but doesn't let you hit any harder

[eric]

per pm and shout

As Peter the Handsome strides towards FectaDEEZ's unprotected behind with ill intent, a weasel scampers across the field of battle.
It leaps for Peter's ankles!
But a pickle falls from Peter's pocket, blocking out the sun.
a pickle rolls 20 on its attack roll = critical hit!
takes 3016 damage!
A big "oh" ripples through the crowd as the creature fails to rise from the dead like a... what's the word? Some kind of mythological bird that comes back to life? Anyway, I guess that rodent learned who was boss, er?

Back to Fecta's back.
peter rolls 7 + 8 + 2 against 11 AC = hit!

Leonardo da Vinci would love to see Fecta's back muscles exposed to the harsh sun. Everyone else is pretty grossed out as Peter's great blade does 9 damage!

.

SPL you are character b



Since pete and timpig are in combat with someone else you can retreat without provoking an attack of opportunity, but this will leave fecta in a pretty precarious position.

[SPL]

SPL the braveheart drunkard's greatsword to bear on Tiny TimPig the Tortured

[Heebs]

From the back of the arena, Simon the Stalwart Sorcerer screams "Finish him!"

[SPL]

Aug 3, 2017 14:03:29 GMT -6 Heebs said:

From the back of the arena, Simon the Stalwart Sorcerer screams "Finish him!"

[eric]

spl rolls 5 + 8 against 17 AC = miss

Tiny @tipgulski is bringing pneumonia back in a big way, nimbly parrying SPL's attack with his burnished bronze buckler.

round two complete. here is the turn order and status for round three:

pete - 6 damage. Looks in fine fettle
herb - no blood on his robe, plenty of blood on his hands
tim - 18 damage, looks okay
spl - 13 damage, the woad is a little runny but he looks ready for more
fecta - 9 damage, he's not looking happy
bankz - 19 damage, literally his entire body is wounded, it's like all the blood is trying to get out of his body at once. So am I saying he's indestructible? No. Even a slight breeze could knock him out.
jhb -21 damage, he's fine. Walk it off.
duc -10 damage, he's fine too.

.

Lazy Pete you are character y



i only shaded the areas you could go without attacks of opportunity, they escalate pretty quickly if you stray from the path but if you want just count out up to four dots in any direction and go for it

[Lazy Pete]

I'll take another run at Fecta

[eric]

Pete mercilessly kicks aside the corpse of ANK1990 -ly Overstated and whirls his great sword upon FectaDEEZ !
pete rolls 3 + 8 + 2 against 11 AC = hit!
11 damage! Fecta is in real bad shape here!
It sure would be lucky for him if a member on his team stepped up to save him rather than pursue their own personal vendetta!

.

Heebs you are character c, you can move anywhere in your range without provoking an attack of opportunity

[Heebs]

Keeping my right arm extended to the sky, missiles of arcane energy shoot from my palm toward Bankz the Beleaguered.

After expelling the last of my arcane energy, I move quickly forward 5 spaces and to the right one space.

[eric]

The crowd holds their breath as one, praying for a miracle...

...that does not come.

Herb's Magic Missile strikes down Bankz with 7 damage!
A child weeps into his pizza.

Bankz is unconscious!
Each turn he will have a 10% chance of stabilizing, and will otherwise lose one HP.
If stable he will gain one HP per turn until he gets back to positive HP.
His teammates can attempt to make a DC 15 Heal check to stabilize him or use healing magic to get him directly to positive HP.
If at any point he reaches -10 HP he will be dead.

The frontrunners Indiana Pacer fans (sorry weird AutoCorrect) in the crowd gleefully cheer on their pale white avatar!

.

TimPig you are character z, and can move freely in the red squares although if I were you I'd stay right where you are.



also i'm going to work out so i'll be back in about an hour. it's still an hour limit but if he posts before i get back it'll be waived

[TimPig]

I will stand pat.

[Lazy Pete]

attack something, Tim

[Lazy Pete]

Kill Fecta

[TimPig]

Oh, Ok. I attack Fecta with my sword.

[eric]

Pete's charisma (and Tim's terrible saves) paying off again!

Tim swings his sword at FectaDEEZ!
tim rolls 13 + 8 against 14 AC = hit!
A gentle cut to the shoulder, 3 damage!
Fecta is not quite dead yet!

.

SPL you are character b, you can move to any of the red shaded squares without penalty if you want

[SPL]

do this again but this time with my eyes open and with less libations... SPL the braveheart drunkard's greatsword to bear on Tiny TimPig the Tortured

[eric]

Drinking water will famously get you less drunk.
Slightly less well-known is the concept of bleeding the alcohol out before it has a chance to get to your brain.
SPL regains sobriety and attacks TimPig!
spl rolls 20 = critical hit!
A massive blow to the lung! Tim takes a deep breath!
Sort of!
13 damage!

.

FectaDEEZ you are character d and can move to either red square without penalty
note that if you try to hide while engaged in combat you will provoke attacks of opportunity

[FectaDEEZ]

I kill tim

[eric]

Fecta's attempt to sway TimPig's attention with the Ocean's Eleven tier ruse "hey Tim don't look at me, instead look somewhere else" fails and so he (Fecta) is forced to attack face to face!
fecta rolls 19 + 1 against 17 AC = critical hit!
fecta rolls 12 + 1 = miss!

Fecta juggles his saber one handed, pirouetting in mayhem, gouging Tim right in the wounded lung for 10 damage!
Tim is starting to noticeably wheeze with each breath!
This almost distracts everyone from Fecta again completely whiffing with his dagger!
It's not the size of the blade you stab someone with.
Well... I guess it is. It's pretty much entirely that.

.

It is technically Bankz' turn, but he rolls a 1 on his stabilization roll so he just lies there bleeding.

[Account Deleted] it is your turn, you are character a



btw i realized i put a red square on the wrong guy before, bankz is character x so you can move into his zone of hurt without provoking an attack of opportunity, what with him being unconscious

[[Account Deleted]]

James the Bearded takes two steps to the left and in one motion swiftly turns and brings the power of Asgard down on Tim the Totally Fucked with a swing of mighty Mjolnir, squashing Tim like a whack-a-mole.

[eric]

A Bearded James leaving his teammate hanging out to dry on defense? Now I've heard everything.
jhb rolls 17 + 8 + 2 against 15 AC = hit!
There are now more bits of TimPig's lung scattered around than grains of sand on the arena floor.
8 damage!
Tim looks around uncertainly.
"Am I squashed now? Should I fall down? I mean, I'm clearly still alive. No? Okay, cool."
Tim is still alive!

.

Heynong Man you are character w, and can move anywhere in your range without penalty



i'm going to bed soon and i really want duc to get at least one turn in, so i'm gonna give him until tomorrow