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Post by [Account Deleted] on Sept 26, 2017 8:24:32 GMT -6
Time for your favorite game of overreacting to small sample sizes. This time with an actual small sample!
1. I'm going to get all of my Hawks' takes out early to spare you guys pain later in the article.
2. Chris Morris (he of the 39.0 ppg on 1.14 pts/tsa) is a Sim God, bow down to your master.
3. FRANK IS BACK. Getting benched for a rookie adequately humbled Mr. Ntilikina and he's now re-dedicated himself to his craft.
4. Elite TT is back! At least until he goes into hibernation next year.
5. Come and get Zarko, tankers! Only 4.6 TO per game!
6. I don't get why the Bucks are elite? Yes, Wilton is a god. Yes, Thon and Collins are a very good set of bigs. Yes, Snoop has made the jump. But Hondo is aging and where is the depth? Count me as selling the Bucks until we fortify the bench in Milwaukee.
7. I don't know who Heebs thinks he is, but I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S A SMALL FORWARD PLAYING AT POINT GUARD. :SIRENS: :SIRENS: :SIRENS:
8. And he's actually doing remarkably well, Go Cocks!
9. Hey, look, Greek Sauce actually playing up to a MaxLE contract level.
10. Bradley Bleal fucks.
11. I think next year is the year that Captain Jax finally breaks through and doesn't suck. Not gonna be this year. Might want to take a look at Jason Gardner on your bench, Canes.
12. Oh look, the Chauncey Billups trade was probably a disaster too. He looks like an all-star again.
13. Kyle Maxver SF 6 34.2 14.8 4.3 3.2 0.7 0.0 0.3 .478 .923 .481
14. At least LeBron is worth the money.
15. Are we still pretending Elton Tyler is really good and not just Jaren Jackson III? And, in case you were wondering, you do know Jaren Jackson Sr because changed his name to Caleb Swanigan.
16. Washington Bullets theme song is actually the same song as the theme song to the hit show The Wire. It actually has nothing to do with having Avon and Marlo on his team, though.
17. Brandin Knight is really fucking good. Count me as really fucking shocked by this.
18. Randy Moss more like Randy Meh.
19. Hey look, a big that scored a bunch in Summit and Summer League (looking at you. Jonathan Ogden) predictably is not scoring well in a league that blocks twice as many shots as real life. Who could have seen it coming?
20. Danny Manning continues to disappoint me every year. Hamidou Diallo does not. #FreeBrittonJohnson
21. Yao Ming is an adopted cousin of the Jaren Jackson family.
22. Tayshaun Prince is the best wing on the Braves right now. I FUCKING SAID IT.
23. CP3yearspasthisprime
24. Remember when Malik Monk was gonna save Buffalo? Ha ha.
25. This is the final form of Dajaun Wagner I envisioned when I was trying to throw first round picks at Dirt for him back in the halcyon Cornell Green days.
26. New York is where above average-ish wings go to die.
27. Bosh contract already aging well. Hopefully his career arc mirrors IRL Bosh and 20s kills him this offseason with some blood clots for GBG's sake. Also Phil Ford doing his best TJ Ford impression this season.
28. #FREERODGRIZZARD
29. When we look back on the Fultz-McGrady era in Toronto, everyone is going to predictably point to Fultz's turnovers as the reason this team never got over the hump and won a title.
30. Vince and T-Mac is absolutely devastating on the wing. The problem with that is Fultz passes it to T-Mac 1/3 of the time, Vince 1/3 of the time, and the other team 1/3 of the time.
31. The Hornets have a lot of good pieces. I can't deny that. I just don't feel like they all fit well together. Their chemistry seems off to me. Probably an organizational culture problem caused by a GM questioning their integrity all the time.
32. The Cavs need to stop screwing around and trade a lot of these meh pieces for a real player. Team is Thunder Dan, Crawford, and MEEEEEEEHHHHHHHH.
33. The Suns have setTM
34. Phoenix Suns, more like Phoenix Duds.
35. Thanks for the dump bucks. thatsimlife.club/3052/boxes/5-7.html
36. There's only one thing you need to know about the down Western Conference this year: DEAN FUCKING OLIVER.
37. Okay, there's another. Billy lost LeBron and almost quit the league. And he's still winning his division. I think that's the definition of a down year for a conference.
38. How exactly is Billy getting away with not starting Esteban Weaver?
39. Did Fason unearth a gem in Mitchell Endacott?
40. Kenny Scolari is aggressively attacking all records for all-time sucking.
41. After Sim 1, all of the Jazz players quit after the coach criticized their performance so that they could have the GM talk them into coming back to the team after saying nice things about them.
42. Skrouse is the most elite GM in the league right now at being average. 0 point differential, 50% winning percentage, right in the middle of league standings. Right where you want to be as a GM.
43. I am not wasting my time discussing the Kings, Wolves, or Lakers.
44. Tajh Holden though...
45. Man there sure is a gaping chasm between my expectations for the Spurs after Friday's pod and what I've seen so far.
46. What happened to Anthony Mason, Tim? Did you guys give him a bunch of free passes to the Western Sizzlin' or something?
47. Despite the stuff I previously said, Kris Dunn is far exceeding my expectations of how I thought he'd play at SG.
48. Speaking of Kris Dunn, let's check in on Kenny "The Franchise" Gregory: Kenny Gregory SG 7 29.7 12.0 4.4 4.9 1.4 1.0 1.9 .363 .789 .333
49. At least Edwin Daniels looks good! Might want to trade him though since you can't tank with a good PG. *check standings* Oh, nevermind.
50. The Blazers are pretty good, but still not amongst the top tier of the conference. Water is wet.
51. Dedric Lawson, more like Dudric Lawson.
52. Myron Random, more like... ...Not very good sim player.
53. This offseason I learned trading elite PGs is a painful game. That's why I've never had one HA HA
54. Odin, you're like even a decent SF away from being pretty good in the West. Step away from the ledge.
55. The 4-2 Clippers have a -4 point differential and are currently a top 4 team in the West. I'll just let that comment speak for itself.
56. Fox over Prince?
57. The Warriors are going to win the West.
58. 31 ppg, 30.2 rpg, 4 spg, 6.4 bpg. Warriors bigs. My god.
59. Trevon Duval's poor passing is killing Doncic and Jackson's efficiency.
60. Hey look I got a Trevon Duval burn in for all of his haters.
61. The End.
62. Go Hawks NFM
1. I'm going to get all of my Hawks' takes out early to spare you guys pain later in the article.
2. Chris Morris (he of the 39.0 ppg on 1.14 pts/tsa) is a Sim God, bow down to your master.
3. FRANK IS BACK. Getting benched for a rookie adequately humbled Mr. Ntilikina and he's now re-dedicated himself to his craft.
4. Elite TT is back! At least until he goes into hibernation next year.
5. Come and get Zarko, tankers! Only 4.6 TO per game!
6. I don't get why the Bucks are elite? Yes, Wilton is a god. Yes, Thon and Collins are a very good set of bigs. Yes, Snoop has made the jump. But Hondo is aging and where is the depth? Count me as selling the Bucks until we fortify the bench in Milwaukee.
7. I don't know who Heebs thinks he is, but I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S A SMALL FORWARD PLAYING AT POINT GUARD. :SIRENS: :SIRENS: :SIRENS:
8. And he's actually doing remarkably well, Go Cocks!
9. Hey, look, Greek Sauce actually playing up to a MaxLE contract level.
10. Bradley Bleal fucks.
11. I think next year is the year that Captain Jax finally breaks through and doesn't suck. Not gonna be this year. Might want to take a look at Jason Gardner on your bench, Canes.
12. Oh look, the Chauncey Billups trade was probably a disaster too. He looks like an all-star again.
13. Kyle Maxver SF 6 34.2 14.8 4.3 3.2 0.7 0.0 0.3 .478 .923 .481
14. At least LeBron is worth the money.
15. Are we still pretending Elton Tyler is really good and not just Jaren Jackson III? And, in case you were wondering, you do know Jaren Jackson Sr because changed his name to Caleb Swanigan.
16. Washington Bullets theme song is actually the same song as the theme song to the hit show The Wire. It actually has nothing to do with having Avon and Marlo on his team, though.
17. Brandin Knight is really fucking good. Count me as really fucking shocked by this.
18. Randy Moss more like Randy Meh.
19. Hey look, a big that scored a bunch in Summit and Summer League (looking at you. Jonathan Ogden) predictably is not scoring well in a league that blocks twice as many shots as real life. Who could have seen it coming?
20. Danny Manning continues to disappoint me every year. Hamidou Diallo does not. #FreeBrittonJohnson
21. Yao Ming is an adopted cousin of the Jaren Jackson family.
22. Tayshaun Prince is the best wing on the Braves right now. I FUCKING SAID IT.
23. CP3yearspasthisprime
24. Remember when Malik Monk was gonna save Buffalo? Ha ha.
25. This is the final form of Dajaun Wagner I envisioned when I was trying to throw first round picks at Dirt for him back in the halcyon Cornell Green days.
26. New York is where above average-ish wings go to die.
27. Bosh contract already aging well. Hopefully his career arc mirrors IRL Bosh and 20s kills him this offseason with some blood clots for GBG's sake. Also Phil Ford doing his best TJ Ford impression this season.
28. #FREERODGRIZZARD
29. When we look back on the Fultz-McGrady era in Toronto, everyone is going to predictably point to Fultz's turnovers as the reason this team never got over the hump and won a title.
30. Vince and T-Mac is absolutely devastating on the wing. The problem with that is Fultz passes it to T-Mac 1/3 of the time, Vince 1/3 of the time, and the other team 1/3 of the time.
31. The Hornets have a lot of good pieces. I can't deny that. I just don't feel like they all fit well together. Their chemistry seems off to me. Probably an organizational culture problem caused by a GM questioning their integrity all the time.
32. The Cavs need to stop screwing around and trade a lot of these meh pieces for a real player. Team is Thunder Dan, Crawford, and MEEEEEEEHHHHHHHH.
33. The Suns have setTM
34. Phoenix Suns, more like Phoenix Duds.
35. Thanks for the dump bucks. thatsimlife.club/3052/boxes/5-7.html
36. There's only one thing you need to know about the down Western Conference this year: DEAN FUCKING OLIVER.
37. Okay, there's another. Billy lost LeBron and almost quit the league. And he's still winning his division. I think that's the definition of a down year for a conference.
38. How exactly is Billy getting away with not starting Esteban Weaver?
39. Did Fason unearth a gem in Mitchell Endacott?
40. Kenny Scolari is aggressively attacking all records for all-time sucking.
41. After Sim 1, all of the Jazz players quit after the coach criticized their performance so that they could have the GM talk them into coming back to the team after saying nice things about them.
42. Skrouse is the most elite GM in the league right now at being average. 0 point differential, 50% winning percentage, right in the middle of league standings. Right where you want to be as a GM.
43. I am not wasting my time discussing the Kings, Wolves, or Lakers.
44. Tajh Holden though...
45. Man there sure is a gaping chasm between my expectations for the Spurs after Friday's pod and what I've seen so far.
46. What happened to Anthony Mason, Tim? Did you guys give him a bunch of free passes to the Western Sizzlin' or something?
47. Despite the stuff I previously said, Kris Dunn is far exceeding my expectations of how I thought he'd play at SG.
48. Speaking of Kris Dunn, let's check in on Kenny "The Franchise" Gregory: Kenny Gregory SG 7 29.7 12.0 4.4 4.9 1.4 1.0 1.9 .363 .789 .333
49. At least Edwin Daniels looks good! Might want to trade him though since you can't tank with a good PG. *check standings* Oh, nevermind.
50. The Blazers are pretty good, but still not amongst the top tier of the conference. Water is wet.
51. Dedric Lawson, more like Dudric Lawson.
52. Myron Random, more like... ...Not very good sim player.
53. This offseason I learned trading elite PGs is a painful game. That's why I've never had one HA HA
54. Odin, you're like even a decent SF away from being pretty good in the West. Step away from the ledge.
55. The 4-2 Clippers have a -4 point differential and are currently a top 4 team in the West. I'll just let that comment speak for itself.
56. Fox over Prince?
57. The Warriors are going to win the West.
58. 31 ppg, 30.2 rpg, 4 spg, 6.4 bpg. Warriors bigs. My god.
59. Trevon Duval's poor passing is killing Doncic and Jackson's efficiency.
60. Hey look I got a Trevon Duval burn in for all of his haters.
61. The End.
62. Go Hawks NFM
