Dil's Oxy Article (854 views)

[dilworth]

Hey guys it's dil. Just had my wisdom teeth out. Popped in some Oxycodone for the first time.

Dil's Best Players in the League Off The Top of my Head by Position (only way to rank players accurately in dil's opinion):

C:
1. Greg Monroe
2. Wilt Chamberlain
3. Emeka Okafor
4. Demarcus Cousins
5. Bill Walton

Not as high on Theo as the rest of you clowns are

PF:
1. Champ Godbolt
2. Cliff Robinson
3. Glenn " "
4. Brian Grant
5. Leon Douglas
 
PF's are weak like seven days

SF:
1. Charles Barkley
2. Stanley Robinson (suck it lint lickers)
3. Larry Kenon
4. Marques Johnson
5. Alvan Adama

SG:
1. MJ
2. Clyde Drexler
3. Grant Hill
4. Reggie King
5. John Drew
HM: Lance (Dil likes lance mucho)

PG:
1. Magic Johnson
2. David Thompson
3. Oscar Robertson
4. Eric Bledsoe
5. Khalid Reeves
6. Alvin Robertson
7. Paul Westphal
8. John Williamson
9. Charlie Ward
10. John Wall

Deep dish pizza



Dil Talks about GMs by divisions:

Dump - I like dump. Nice guy. Feels like a weird cousin that I enjoy spending time with over holidays. Very impressed by his casino/bank work. Go Celtics.
Canes - Canes is cool as a person, frustrating as a GM though. Especially lately with his inactivity. It's too hot in his kitchen.
Hebrew - Keep it up.
SPL - seems like the type of guy that has lots of excel sheets with non-necessary excel sheet information.
MJ - keeps gaining weight
Fason - Thanks for the wins
kn88 - my brotha. The second one of his kind in tmbsl (:)). I wish I had your extra calf muscle.

RW - makes me laugh with his stupid questions that only new GMs ask. LOL at buster's impression. Get it together. Stop smoking so much.
RV - seems like he wears PFG fishing shirts. No one should wear PFG fishing shirts. I like RV.
Bruns - Eat my game 7 dust plsthxjk. Don't cheat on your significant other anymore and maybe you would've won. I like bruns.
heel - the most mediocre core of three max guys I've ever seen.
Wolf - don't know you but wolves are p sick animals. Tigers are cooler though. Should be Tigerstanson
harry - where do I begin
trofie - I'm actually really impressed at the way you build your teams. Best in the league at doing so imo. Except I didn't like any of your most recent trades at all.
Pete - I would hang out with you

Soup - You really piss me off with your touchyness and doucheyness but you're a good dude and I think we would get along well irl.
Bankz - Bankz really never bothers me. Good guy who is a p mediocre GM. He cares about tmbsl which I appreciate. We're opening up a hibachi pizza place. You guys should come and eat tmbsl special, 29 toppings.
Dil - needs another pill as this one is fading quick
Ian - love you ian. You'll never convince me that's not your twitter. I might go to Taiwan in May can you tell me what to do there?
JHB - also wears PFG shirts imo. Should not do that anymore imo.
2poor - I like him more than the average tmbsl'er. I think he's funny and I like how he messes with the guys who are easily messed with.
20's - Kansas City-Omaha Kings is a stupid name. I like 20's.

Druce - Go grizzlies. I'm pleased that you are the GM of that beloved team.
Devine - Cut your hair like a normal adult and you won't look like a 15 yr old emo kid as much.
Dirt - Seems like you don't like me as much as you used to and I don't know what I did. Like me more pls. I like you.
Buster - probably my favorite GM. Very similar opinions on things.
Ank - I don't know anything about you.
Duc - Do you try to have to late lotto pick every year? I like Mr. Duc.
Yawn - Vedder? I barely know her.

Odin - You're a great commish and I think about your voice often. RTR. Thanks for busting Ennis Whatley. And Iggy. And Larry Sanders.



Teams that have cap for Magic, what they would look like, and if I would be pissed or not if they got him:

Miami Heat:
C: Scoonie
PF: ?
SF: Laettner
SG: King
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: Yes


Orlando Magic:
C: Greg Monroe
PF: Glenn Robinson
SF: Tom Barker
SG: Dorrell Wright
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: No


Detroit Pistons:
C: Americas John Lewis
PF: Thurl Bailey
SF: ?
SG: Reggie Lewis
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: Yes


Indiana Pacers:
C: Jason Smith
PF: ?
SF: Kevin Durant
SG: Gary Bossert
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: No


Denver Nuggets:
C: ?
PF: ?
SF: ?
SG: Nick Young
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: Yes


Houston Rockets:
C: Wilt Chamberlain
PF: Magic
SF: Stanley Robinsons
SG: George Gervin
PG: Khalid Reeves

or

C: Wilt Chamberlain
PF: Dwyane Schintzius
SF: Stanley Robinson
SG: Khalid Reeves
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed: No


Los Angeles Lakers:
C: Dick Furry
PF: Al Horford
SF: ?
SG: Bart Kofoed
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed? Yes, because Buster would build a great team around him that I don't want to be in my conference.


Portland Trailblazers:
C: Ha Seung-Jin
PF: Sidney Green
SF: Xavier Henry
SG: Gary Payton
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed? A little.


Seattle Supersonics:
C: Jim McIlvaine
PF: Antoine Carr
SF: Jeff Green
SG: ?
PG: Magic

Would dil be pissed? No.

[20s Navidad]

5

20's - Kansas City-Omaha Kings is a stupid name.

That's all I get?

[Souper Troopers]

laughed multiple times

[dilworth]

Dec 29, 2014 15:04:45 GMT -6 20s Navidad said:

5

20's - Kansas City-Omaha Kings is a stupid name.

That's all I get?

edited

[Lazy Pete]

Congrats 20s

[20s Navidad]

Stanley has an argument for [HASH]1 SF. I agree with him at [HASH]2 though.

[Lazy Pete]

Dec 29, 2014 15:00:17 GMT -6 dilworth said:

Not as high on Theo as the rest of you clowns are

[Bruns]

lost it on MJ keeps gaining weight and vedder? I barely know her.

[Buster 5000]

Great article. Laughed multiple times. Love you Dil.

[Mad King]

Dale Ellis on the rise like the sun

[Face-in]

We need more articles like this. Sim league step your drug game up.

Still waiting for that stoner RT.

[IanBoyd]

Taiwan is not a real country you high fuck.

[Bankz]

Well done Dil.. I will work on being a better GM.

[Bruns]

Forgot about that stonger RT. typical stoner

[Swaggy Z]

I just want to point out that anyone who thinks Jason Kidd is underwhelming sucks at life. I also would like to add that I enjoy being underwhelming. Nobody expects it but them Cavs are always coming for you.

[Deleted]

I enjoy being a weird cousin

[2poor]

This was a great read

[MJ]

I actually start personal training in 2 weeks. Weird shit yo

[KwYawnza]

Tigerstanson. Ha.

[Deleted]

No PFG for me. I do have a Tennessee Columbia PFG but I haven't worn that in 2 years.

[kn88]

dil my G. good stuff. 5

[[Account Deleted]]

I have never worn a PFG shirt and actively make fun of people who wear them and ask them if I can come fishing with them.

You should be ashamed for making such a rash assumption.

[dilworth]

My dude

[dilworth]

Thoughts on the player rankings?

[ANK1990]

You trash Catfish and me in the same article? wow

[Heynong Man]

I like you too dawg

[Deleted]

The article that changed MJ's life

[eric]

C:
1. Greg Monroe

PF:
1. Champ Godbolt
4. Brian Grant

i've had three of the best bigs in the league from ten seasons ago on my team, well past their prime. classic knicks if i do say so myself.

[dilworth]

Don't remember writing this at all.

[Deleted]

I think you got spl and eric mixed up