Post by Heebs on Jan 12, 2016 20:34:41 GMT -6
Title Contenders
1. Kansas City Kings – The Kings sit alone atop the Western Conference leaderboard as well as the Cuban Report Power Rankings.
2. Denver Nuggets – The baby Nuggets are all grown up and will go as far as Brandon takes them. It was tough choosing between the Nuggets and the Jazz here, but ultimately Brandon is the best player on either team and puts the Nuggets at #2 in the first edition of this year’s power rankings.
3. Utah Jazz – SPL’s got the best three-headed monster since Oscar, Clyde, and Gary were losing game 7s in Phoenix. It’s interesting, too, because coming into this season his front-court was his strength.
4. New York Knicks – the small-town Knickerbockers are a feel-good story for all of sim America!
5. Philadelphia 76ers – No, this is not a Pepsi Max commercial. Yes, Fason is trying to squeeze every last drop of success out of the ageless Shareef Abdur-Rahim and his sidekick, Justin Anderson.
The Playoff Locks
6. Toronto Raptors – Bit by the injury bug, Pete is going to have to rely on bench depth to keep him afloat the beginning of this season. We’re not worried though, as he’s still got a ton of talent on the roster.
7. Brooklyn Nets – Don’t let the record deceive you, the Nets are still missing a championship-caliber backcourt to go along with KG, Lockhart, and Tobi.
8. Portland Trailblazers – With Curry, Savage, and Swift expiring, this may be the swan song for the Blazers. Do not fear Portlandia, Druce is quite adept at rebuilding rosters.
9. Phoenix Suns – The defending champs begin the season in the top 10 of the Report’s power rankings. Not bad considering their point guard is still Frank Johnson.
10. Cleveland Cavaliers – Shaun has a very nice roster headlined by Damon “Mighty Mouse” Stoudamire. He’ll be lock to make the playoffs again this year, but may need to get creative if he wants to sustain success going forward.
Playoff Contenders
11. Milwaukee Bucks – Personally, we like the Bucks squad and feel like they should be a few spots higher in the power rankings. However, we received a memo from corporate this morning informing us that we were prohibited from ranking the Bucks in the top 10.
12. Indiana Pacers – The Pacers are the Hawks of five sim seasons ago. While they continue to win due to their elite point guard, the rest of their roster is pretty bad.
13. Golden State Warriors – The Warriors are not yet ready for prime time, and thankfully they still have their picks. They would be advised to liquidate any decent player worth a pick or two (Lawson and Herb) and tank for a decent pick this year and build around Saric, Beasley, Gordon, and Tarpley. The combination of good older players, and elite-looking (but still developing) players, is not a good look.
14. Los Angeles Lakers – Most MLB pitchers have a batting average better than JaVale McGee’s FG percentage. Good lord, Buster, put him on the IR!
15. Memphis Bobcats – Hopefully the Dragic at PG experiment is over. It is a good time to own Bobcats picks.
16. San Antonio Spurs – It remains to be seen how Vic is going to turn a pretty good core of Horny and Bias into a title contender. We assume he’ll have to find a third star and add quite a bit of starter-caliber players.
17. Chicago Bulls – Without his own picks, at least Bruns is winning games. We’re not quite sure how – but the Bulls may make the playoffs.
18. Washington Bullets – After entering the league amidst significant fanfare, Kyrie Irving hasn’t improved significantly since his rookie year. Still 20 with A potential, the future remains bright for the young man. That said, it may have been a premature end to the tank in Chocolate City.
19. Minnesota Timberwolves – KN’s JV team may actually be more talented than the Bullets, but their team success doesn’t prove that out. It’s hard to look at their roster and imagine how they are 4-7 with a 5+ ppg deficit.
20. Vancouver Grizzlies – Will Druce rebuild or merely reload. After selling off Overton and Sharman for a good return, chances are good that he’ll look to find a starting caliber PG instead of hitting the reset button in Vancouver.
21. Miami Heat – Selvy is the only thing keeping this squad out of the cellar. It’s looking bleak in Miami.
Tankers
22. Houston Rockets – After sneaking through two sims starting his third best PG, Dil’s rockets are actually better than their record indicates. Anthony, Johnson, Kobe, McGary, and Noe would challenge for a playoff spot if he weren’t trying to lose.
23. Oklahoma City Thunder – This Thunder squad may challenge for the TO record. Not surprisingly, over half of his roster is comprised of eric-made players.
24. Charlotte Hornets – The front-court is strong with this one, but the rest of the roster is pretty bad.
25. Orlando Magic – I like JHB. Drafting players is a crap shoot. Drafting eric-made players, in a league filled with non-eric made players, is a disadvantage. Poor JHB.
26. Boston Celtics – We’re really high on the Celtics future. Emiid is a monster and his team is still very bad. Two or three more hits in the draft and this Celtic’s core could be very good.
27. Los Angeles Clippers – His entire roster is expiring. That feat, in and of itself, is enough to keep the Clippers ahead of the Sonics and Hawks in the power rankings.
28. Seattle Supersonics – We like yawn. He has his pick. His team is terrible. He’s doing the right thing.
Negligent Dipshits
29. Atlanta Hawks – We like devine. He doesn’t have his pick. His team is terrible. Stop taking advice from JHB you idiot.
