Post by 2poor on Jun 16, 2014 8:27:48 GMT -6
argue with me about them
Best Teams
Here are your contenders shooting for a spot on the league banner
5. Boston Celtics- The Celtics have an elite inside-outside combo in Lanier and Adams. Add in the rising Cliff Robinson, and a more-than-steady PG in World B Free, and the fighting dumptimes look like a legit finals contender to me, if only because it plays in the JV conference.
4. Milwaukee Bucks- So halfway through last season, I figured trofie was kind of capped out on moves. He had traded a lot of future picks, and Truck Robinson, his most obvious trade piece, was on an expiring deal. When will I learn to never doubt trofie? Half a season later, he has assembled a freakish core as offensively skilled as it is defensively intimidating. The scariest part is that there is still room for improvement on this roster. Improvement at PG should be very easy to pull off.
3. Utah Jazz- After the crushing Game 7 Finals loss, followed by the FA betrayal of Block Brother Caldwell Jones, this is a roster that has taken a step backwards. 2Poor probably still boasts the best perimeter talent in the league, but the defense and rebounding frontcourt doesn't defend or rebound as hard as last season. It will take another move to get this squad back to the top of the always brutal Western Conference.
2. Los Angeles Clippers- dirt boasts probably the freakiest player in the league in Magic Johnson, who is half an rebound per game away from averaging a triple double. When you consider he also has one of the greatest scoring machines the league has ever seen in Pistol, and a premier big man in Artis Gilmore, and it is tough to see anyone knocking the Clip show out of the playoffs.
1. Dallas Mavericks- the news that soup has agreed in principle to trade for Elvin Hayes makes this team probably the scariest team the league has ever seen. The continuing maturation of Jimmy Paxson means there isn't really a weak spot in the starting lineup anymore. Kenon and Skywalker are a duo that no team is able to stop, and few can even slow down. With Mt. Eaton clogging the paint, it's no wonder the Mavs lead the league in both rebounding and defensive fg percentage.
Honorable Mentions: Charlotte Hornets, Portland Trailblazers, Cleveland Cavaliers
Worst Teams
Here are your squads praying to bring Bernard King's talents to town
5. Philadelphia 76ers- fason tore it all down last season, and has made no effort to build it back up. His only problem now is that he has 3 players who actually could get minutes on a decent team. Barnes, Haywood and Grant mean he is not likely to end the season with the most ping pong balls, but the toxic waste pile that are his guards mean they are going to be really close.
4. New Orleans Pelicans- The main problem Oops has this season is that he has a PG with A- handles. To tank like a pro you need 7 PGs who shouldn't actually be allowed to play PG by league rules. Johnny Moore's steady hand, and Bill Robinzine's scoring punch mean Oops is not tanking as hard as some of our other celebrated tankers.
3. Washington Bullets- kn88 built the worst team in Sim League history, his record of 1-81, and his 80 game losing streak, are records that will stand forever. The arrival of Jalen Rose means kn88 has a blue chipper he has to neutralize in his quest for more top draft picks, but looking at the D-League level talent that fills the rest of this roster means it shouldn't be too much of a problem.
2. Phoenix Suns- I'm not used to seeing ankly down in the standings like this. If this team was in the east, he might get bumped down to the 3 or 4 spot on this list, but playing extra games against the top 9 western teams means Phoenix is going to rack up losses at an impressive clip, even with having Allan Bristow and Mitch Kupchak on the roster.
1. Memphis Grizzlies- I think looking at this roster just gave me cancer.
Honorable Mentions: Denver Nuggets, Orlando Magic, New York Knicks
Best Players
If you have one of these guys, you are doing something wrong if you aren't contending for a title
5. George Gervin- Maybe you think I'm a homer for putting him in here. Well, I think you're stupid. Iceman is the most prolific 3 point shooter in this league's history. He gets buckets like few in the league can. I think his defense lags behind his grades a little bit, and he doesn't crash the boards as hard as a lot of 3s in the league, which holds him back a bit.
4. Julius Erving- Dr. J isn't as good as Iceman at the act of putting the ball in the basket, but he has an edge on his fellow top 2 creation draft pick in virtually every other facet of the game. He's a force of nature defensively, and averages almost double digits on the boards. And he's still averaging over 28ppg on 49% shooting, which I think you can work with.
3. David Thompson- This was a pick that surprised a lot of people in creation, but look at what a terror he has become. Skywalker flirts with the top of the league in both scoring and assists every year now. His percentages are a bit lower than the other players on this list, but he's only 24 and still has A potential. The Mavs will be a contender as long as he decides to suit up there, which will hopefully be for only another 2 years.
2. Bill Walton- Walton may have more impact than any other player in the league. In my opinion duc hasn't put the strongest supporting cast around Walton, and the Blazers have still made 2 straight conference finals. The Blazers own the paint against every other team in the league, and big ginger is why.
1. Magic Johnson- I'm mostly just mad when you see what this guy is doing in only his second year in the league. To be in a conference with him is to truly know fear.
Honorable Mentions: Bob Lanier, Paul Westphal, Billy Paultz
Best GMs
I'm consistently impressed by the creativity, willingness to take risks, and intelligence these dudes have when it comes to running their teams.
5. Buster- Buster had a ton of success with his Westbrook era teams in 2.0, but he has had a lot of difficulty reaching that level since he traded Russ to kick off the Clippers dynasty. Buster is still looking to land one star so that he can start winning in 4.0, but the one thing that always impresses me with Buster is his drafting. I don't know how he does it, but Buster magically always knows which big at pick 22 or which wing at 27 is going to turn into a credible player. His teams always have tremendous depth because of this
4. ankly- ankly, like Buster, has struggled to find his footing in 4.0 so far, but he was so consistently dominant towards the end of 2.0, that I don't see this lasting for long. Sometime soon ank is going to totally trade rape a guy for a superstar, and then we will all see something we never thought we would see: Phoenix high in the standings.
3. dirt- Early in my time in 2.0, I thought dirt would often make trades just to make trades, but he has since refined his propensity for big moves into a total weapon. He built the greatest dynasty I've ever seen in 2.0, and then built a championship contender in like 20 minutes last week. He was a pretty good commish, but the league is better when Joe Dirte is running a front office.
2. soup- soup is so consistently good that he's just boring. He's the Spurs of Sim League. He's just good at everything, always thinking 3 steps ahead, always aware of what he needs to take his team to the next level, and has like 3 ideas on how he's going to get it. I hate being in his division.
1. trofie- I'm so mystified by what trofie does year after year that he has to be some kind of witch doctor or something. He just never rebuilds. Ever. He reaches a point where he decides his team can't win a title, and then in 3 trades has assembled a new core that is an instant title contender. How does this guy always have such a huge amount of trade assets? He seems to always have like 8 draft picks he can give away.
Honorable mentions: IanBoyd, dilworth, tyler
Worst contracts
you done goofed with these ones
5. Bob McAdoo- In the 3000 season, Big Bob looked like the best player in the league, but he has apparently developed a real bad coke habit. He just gets worse every year. canes now has over 100 mil committed to this guy over the next 6 years. If you extrapolate McAdoo's statistical trends, then by the final season he will be averaging like 10, and 6 on 21% shooting. I wouldn't take this guy if canes offered a free first and a steak dinner with him.
4. Dan Issel- This one isn't nearly as bad as it appeared to be at first glance, when it drew laughs from virtually the entire league. I still think it was an indefensible offer to make, but Issel has turned into a legitimate weapon for trofie's now stacked Bucks squad. I should probably swap this one and McAdoo in the rankings, but I'm too lazy to cut/paste.
3. Darryl Dawkins- boy was I way off on this one. Before this season, I declared chocolate thunder to be the next 2.0 Andrew Bynum. Well since then, bruns has given him 93 million dollars, and Dawkins immediately blew it all at the buffet table and fell apart in TC. He's currently shooting under 40% on a team that desperately needs his scoring. Why rw is going to the mattresses to bring this one on is beyond me.
2. Mitch Kupchak- this was ank's worst move since he traded a young Dr. J to dirt for Paul Neumann. I didn't bother to check the numbers, but I feel like giving this 8 mil a year type player a full max kept ank from keeping scoring machine John Williamson. Not too good.
1. Dan Roundfield- this was the most mystifying contract offer I've ever seen. I have no idea what devine was thinking. He let Richard Washington walk in order to grab this defensive specialist? This is going to haunt the Warriors franchise until the day it expires. I hope user clown doesn't check in on the league in the next 6 seasons, because he will weep when he sees what has happened to his beloved franchise.
Honorable Mentions: Bill Brennan, Dave Cowens, Bingo Smith
Full maxes I most want to land this offseason
I have 30 mil of cap space this offseason. I want to have a dumptime type lucky streak on day 1. NOTE: this all assumes Gervin likes his Bird rights and opts to re-sign. Otherwise he would come in at #1.
5. Larry Kenon- signing a big player away from a division rival is always a good thing. Kenon would give me the biggest set of wings in the league, both of whom can lock you down defensively. He doesn't fit with my outside emphasis offense, but Kenon has always completely destroyed Gervin on both ends of the court, and it would be a real pleasure to not have to play him again.
4. Billy Paultz- This guy just kills me every time I play the Hornets. I don't care that he's 30 already. I have a big need at Center, and bigs that want to bomb it from 3 are rare. He would be a great fit in my all-outside-all-the-time offense.
3. Bobby Jones- Before JHB traded for him, I was trying to figure out how I could assemble a godfather offer for this guy. I love him so much, and am so mad that everyone insists on playing him at small forward. DON'T YOU SEE HOW DEVASTATING HE WOULD BE AT THE 4? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
2. Julius Erving- Having the top 2 creation draft picks on the same team would be very special, and would be completely devastating to the league. Starting Gervin, Dr. J and Buse on my perimeter would be pretty unfair.
1. Paul Westphal- Not only is Paul an absolute superstar, but he is the player that cost me my second title. He spent 7 games just torturing Rick Barry and his A+ defense. Westphal and Gervin could be the most devastating offensive tandem in 4.0 history. It also would be a nice amount of vengeance against tyler. I'm still not over those finals.
Honorable Mentions: Lionel Hollins, Marvin Webster, Jamaal Wilkes
Worst things that have happened to 2Poor in 4.0
So I've had a pretty charmed existence so far in 4.0 (will probably change in this FA period), but it hasn't all been sunshine and rainbows.
5. Odin's resim in the first season- George Johnson suffered a 45 day injury in the re-sim. If George had been healthy all season, I probably would have walked into the playoffs as the number one seed, instead of as the 4.
4. Caldwell Jones breaks up the block brothers- If I had the Bird rights on Caldwell, I would have offered him something really stupid in FA, as that 5 man core I had was pretty good together, and the absurd shot blocking and rebounding numbers Caldwell and George put up was a large part of it. I offered him the most money the software would allow, but known chicken fucker bruns offered him a lot more, even after drafting 2 bigs in the previous draft.
3. dirt decides he wants Artis Gilmore- A week before the last FA period, I offered Tiny Archibald, George Johnson, Angel Profit and 2 1st round picks to heel for Artis Gilmore. I thought I was going to land him, and then dirt sent in an offer I couldn't hope to match. Sending 2 all-star caliber talents and overpaid bum Rich Kelly would do more to keep heel out of the lottery than anything I was willing to offer. I really think a Gilmore/Brewer/Gervin/Barry/Buse starting 5 would have been good for like 68 wins.
2. fason decides he wants the Philadelphia 76ers- I had last pick in the team lottery. I knew I desperately wanted in the Eastern Conference, just going by what the GM list looked like in each conference. Fason had a similar idea, and I was thrown into the battle scarred hellscape that is the Midwest division, something that will negatively affect my prospects at winning titles until the end of 4.0.
1. Paul Westphal goes HAM- After the first 3 games of last year's finals, I was already popping the champagne. I'll be honest, once Ian and Soup were both upset in round 1, I was already popping the champagne. I considered them the only 2 teams that had a shot at beating me, and they were now out of my way! I had housed Detroit by double digits in both of our regular season games. Well, Paul Westphal had other ideas, and what was probably the best chance I will ever have at a second title was taken from me.
Honorable Mentions: Nate Archibald can't get playing time and kills his trade value, George Gervin leaves in FA (won't happen until after season), Don Buse gets severe depression and misses playoffs (won't happen until Sim 10)
Best Teams
Here are your contenders shooting for a spot on the league banner
5. Boston Celtics- The Celtics have an elite inside-outside combo in Lanier and Adams. Add in the rising Cliff Robinson, and a more-than-steady PG in World B Free, and the fighting dumptimes look like a legit finals contender to me, if only because it plays in the JV conference.
4. Milwaukee Bucks- So halfway through last season, I figured trofie was kind of capped out on moves. He had traded a lot of future picks, and Truck Robinson, his most obvious trade piece, was on an expiring deal. When will I learn to never doubt trofie? Half a season later, he has assembled a freakish core as offensively skilled as it is defensively intimidating. The scariest part is that there is still room for improvement on this roster. Improvement at PG should be very easy to pull off.
3. Utah Jazz- After the crushing Game 7 Finals loss, followed by the FA betrayal of Block Brother Caldwell Jones, this is a roster that has taken a step backwards. 2Poor probably still boasts the best perimeter talent in the league, but the defense and rebounding frontcourt doesn't defend or rebound as hard as last season. It will take another move to get this squad back to the top of the always brutal Western Conference.
2. Los Angeles Clippers- dirt boasts probably the freakiest player in the league in Magic Johnson, who is half an rebound per game away from averaging a triple double. When you consider he also has one of the greatest scoring machines the league has ever seen in Pistol, and a premier big man in Artis Gilmore, and it is tough to see anyone knocking the Clip show out of the playoffs.
1. Dallas Mavericks- the news that soup has agreed in principle to trade for Elvin Hayes makes this team probably the scariest team the league has ever seen. The continuing maturation of Jimmy Paxson means there isn't really a weak spot in the starting lineup anymore. Kenon and Skywalker are a duo that no team is able to stop, and few can even slow down. With Mt. Eaton clogging the paint, it's no wonder the Mavs lead the league in both rebounding and defensive fg percentage.
Honorable Mentions: Charlotte Hornets, Portland Trailblazers, Cleveland Cavaliers
Worst Teams
Here are your squads praying to bring Bernard King's talents to town
5. Philadelphia 76ers- fason tore it all down last season, and has made no effort to build it back up. His only problem now is that he has 3 players who actually could get minutes on a decent team. Barnes, Haywood and Grant mean he is not likely to end the season with the most ping pong balls, but the toxic waste pile that are his guards mean they are going to be really close.
4. New Orleans Pelicans- The main problem Oops has this season is that he has a PG with A- handles. To tank like a pro you need 7 PGs who shouldn't actually be allowed to play PG by league rules. Johnny Moore's steady hand, and Bill Robinzine's scoring punch mean Oops is not tanking as hard as some of our other celebrated tankers.
3. Washington Bullets- kn88 built the worst team in Sim League history, his record of 1-81, and his 80 game losing streak, are records that will stand forever. The arrival of Jalen Rose means kn88 has a blue chipper he has to neutralize in his quest for more top draft picks, but looking at the D-League level talent that fills the rest of this roster means it shouldn't be too much of a problem.
2. Phoenix Suns- I'm not used to seeing ankly down in the standings like this. If this team was in the east, he might get bumped down to the 3 or 4 spot on this list, but playing extra games against the top 9 western teams means Phoenix is going to rack up losses at an impressive clip, even with having Allan Bristow and Mitch Kupchak on the roster.
1. Memphis Grizzlies- I think looking at this roster just gave me cancer.
Honorable Mentions: Denver Nuggets, Orlando Magic, New York Knicks
Best Players
If you have one of these guys, you are doing something wrong if you aren't contending for a title
5. George Gervin- Maybe you think I'm a homer for putting him in here. Well, I think you're stupid. Iceman is the most prolific 3 point shooter in this league's history. He gets buckets like few in the league can. I think his defense lags behind his grades a little bit, and he doesn't crash the boards as hard as a lot of 3s in the league, which holds him back a bit.
4. Julius Erving- Dr. J isn't as good as Iceman at the act of putting the ball in the basket, but he has an edge on his fellow top 2 creation draft pick in virtually every other facet of the game. He's a force of nature defensively, and averages almost double digits on the boards. And he's still averaging over 28ppg on 49% shooting, which I think you can work with.
3. David Thompson- This was a pick that surprised a lot of people in creation, but look at what a terror he has become. Skywalker flirts with the top of the league in both scoring and assists every year now. His percentages are a bit lower than the other players on this list, but he's only 24 and still has A potential. The Mavs will be a contender as long as he decides to suit up there, which will hopefully be for only another 2 years.
2. Bill Walton- Walton may have more impact than any other player in the league. In my opinion duc hasn't put the strongest supporting cast around Walton, and the Blazers have still made 2 straight conference finals. The Blazers own the paint against every other team in the league, and big ginger is why.
1. Magic Johnson- I'm mostly just mad when you see what this guy is doing in only his second year in the league. To be in a conference with him is to truly know fear.
Honorable Mentions: Bob Lanier, Paul Westphal, Billy Paultz
Best GMs
I'm consistently impressed by the creativity, willingness to take risks, and intelligence these dudes have when it comes to running their teams.
5. Buster- Buster had a ton of success with his Westbrook era teams in 2.0, but he has had a lot of difficulty reaching that level since he traded Russ to kick off the Clippers dynasty. Buster is still looking to land one star so that he can start winning in 4.0, but the one thing that always impresses me with Buster is his drafting. I don't know how he does it, but Buster magically always knows which big at pick 22 or which wing at 27 is going to turn into a credible player. His teams always have tremendous depth because of this
4. ankly- ankly, like Buster, has struggled to find his footing in 4.0 so far, but he was so consistently dominant towards the end of 2.0, that I don't see this lasting for long. Sometime soon ank is going to totally trade rape a guy for a superstar, and then we will all see something we never thought we would see: Phoenix high in the standings.
3. dirt- Early in my time in 2.0, I thought dirt would often make trades just to make trades, but he has since refined his propensity for big moves into a total weapon. He built the greatest dynasty I've ever seen in 2.0, and then built a championship contender in like 20 minutes last week. He was a pretty good commish, but the league is better when Joe Dirte is running a front office.
2. soup- soup is so consistently good that he's just boring. He's the Spurs of Sim League. He's just good at everything, always thinking 3 steps ahead, always aware of what he needs to take his team to the next level, and has like 3 ideas on how he's going to get it. I hate being in his division.
1. trofie- I'm so mystified by what trofie does year after year that he has to be some kind of witch doctor or something. He just never rebuilds. Ever. He reaches a point where he decides his team can't win a title, and then in 3 trades has assembled a new core that is an instant title contender. How does this guy always have such a huge amount of trade assets? He seems to always have like 8 draft picks he can give away.
Honorable mentions: IanBoyd, dilworth, tyler
Worst contracts
you done goofed with these ones
5. Bob McAdoo- In the 3000 season, Big Bob looked like the best player in the league, but he has apparently developed a real bad coke habit. He just gets worse every year. canes now has over 100 mil committed to this guy over the next 6 years. If you extrapolate McAdoo's statistical trends, then by the final season he will be averaging like 10, and 6 on 21% shooting. I wouldn't take this guy if canes offered a free first and a steak dinner with him.
4. Dan Issel- This one isn't nearly as bad as it appeared to be at first glance, when it drew laughs from virtually the entire league. I still think it was an indefensible offer to make, but Issel has turned into a legitimate weapon for trofie's now stacked Bucks squad. I should probably swap this one and McAdoo in the rankings, but I'm too lazy to cut/paste.
3. Darryl Dawkins- boy was I way off on this one. Before this season, I declared chocolate thunder to be the next 2.0 Andrew Bynum. Well since then, bruns has given him 93 million dollars, and Dawkins immediately blew it all at the buffet table and fell apart in TC. He's currently shooting under 40% on a team that desperately needs his scoring. Why rw is going to the mattresses to bring this one on is beyond me.
2. Mitch Kupchak- this was ank's worst move since he traded a young Dr. J to dirt for Paul Neumann. I didn't bother to check the numbers, but I feel like giving this 8 mil a year type player a full max kept ank from keeping scoring machine John Williamson. Not too good.
1. Dan Roundfield- this was the most mystifying contract offer I've ever seen. I have no idea what devine was thinking. He let Richard Washington walk in order to grab this defensive specialist? This is going to haunt the Warriors franchise until the day it expires. I hope user clown doesn't check in on the league in the next 6 seasons, because he will weep when he sees what has happened to his beloved franchise.
Honorable Mentions: Bill Brennan, Dave Cowens, Bingo Smith
Full maxes I most want to land this offseason
I have 30 mil of cap space this offseason. I want to have a dumptime type lucky streak on day 1. NOTE: this all assumes Gervin likes his Bird rights and opts to re-sign. Otherwise he would come in at #1.
5. Larry Kenon- signing a big player away from a division rival is always a good thing. Kenon would give me the biggest set of wings in the league, both of whom can lock you down defensively. He doesn't fit with my outside emphasis offense, but Kenon has always completely destroyed Gervin on both ends of the court, and it would be a real pleasure to not have to play him again.
4. Billy Paultz- This guy just kills me every time I play the Hornets. I don't care that he's 30 already. I have a big need at Center, and bigs that want to bomb it from 3 are rare. He would be a great fit in my all-outside-all-the-time offense.
3. Bobby Jones- Before JHB traded for him, I was trying to figure out how I could assemble a godfather offer for this guy. I love him so much, and am so mad that everyone insists on playing him at small forward. DON'T YOU SEE HOW DEVASTATING HE WOULD BE AT THE 4? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
2. Julius Erving- Having the top 2 creation draft picks on the same team would be very special, and would be completely devastating to the league. Starting Gervin, Dr. J and Buse on my perimeter would be pretty unfair.
1. Paul Westphal- Not only is Paul an absolute superstar, but he is the player that cost me my second title. He spent 7 games just torturing Rick Barry and his A+ defense. Westphal and Gervin could be the most devastating offensive tandem in 4.0 history. It also would be a nice amount of vengeance against tyler. I'm still not over those finals.
Honorable Mentions: Lionel Hollins, Marvin Webster, Jamaal Wilkes
Worst things that have happened to 2Poor in 4.0
So I've had a pretty charmed existence so far in 4.0 (will probably change in this FA period), but it hasn't all been sunshine and rainbows.
5. Odin's resim in the first season- George Johnson suffered a 45 day injury in the re-sim. If George had been healthy all season, I probably would have walked into the playoffs as the number one seed, instead of as the 4.
4. Caldwell Jones breaks up the block brothers- If I had the Bird rights on Caldwell, I would have offered him something really stupid in FA, as that 5 man core I had was pretty good together, and the absurd shot blocking and rebounding numbers Caldwell and George put up was a large part of it. I offered him the most money the software would allow, but known chicken fucker bruns offered him a lot more, even after drafting 2 bigs in the previous draft.
3. dirt decides he wants Artis Gilmore- A week before the last FA period, I offered Tiny Archibald, George Johnson, Angel Profit and 2 1st round picks to heel for Artis Gilmore. I thought I was going to land him, and then dirt sent in an offer I couldn't hope to match. Sending 2 all-star caliber talents and overpaid bum Rich Kelly would do more to keep heel out of the lottery than anything I was willing to offer. I really think a Gilmore/Brewer/Gervin/Barry/Buse starting 5 would have been good for like 68 wins.
2. fason decides he wants the Philadelphia 76ers- I had last pick in the team lottery. I knew I desperately wanted in the Eastern Conference, just going by what the GM list looked like in each conference. Fason had a similar idea, and I was thrown into the battle scarred hellscape that is the Midwest division, something that will negatively affect my prospects at winning titles until the end of 4.0.
1. Paul Westphal goes HAM- After the first 3 games of last year's finals, I was already popping the champagne. I'll be honest, once Ian and Soup were both upset in round 1, I was already popping the champagne. I considered them the only 2 teams that had a shot at beating me, and they were now out of my way! I had housed Detroit by double digits in both of our regular season games. Well, Paul Westphal had other ideas, and what was probably the best chance I will ever have at a second title was taken from me.
Honorable Mentions: Nate Archibald can't get playing time and kills his trade value, George Gervin leaves in FA (won't happen until after season), Don Buse gets severe depression and misses playoffs (won't happen until Sim 10)
