Post by Citizen Cane on May 1, 2016 7:11:02 GMT -6
1. was playing basketball. down by 3 with like 4 seconds left. i had been on fire from 3 all through practice that week and warmups. the coach from story 3 planned to give me the ball in the post because that's an easy 2 but then i reminded him we were down by 3. so we run the inbound play, no one was open, so i sprint to the corner, catch the ball, turn around, and shoot. i miss so badly that it hit the wall on the other side of the gym.
2. was playing basketball in high school against Haleyville (fuck winston county). they had a center who was about 5'10" 265 but that's not really important other than he was fat as shit. So i go up to grab a rebound and i land on this fatass's foot and break my ankle. My coach came out onto the floor to check on me (naturally) and asked what was hurting. And, as loud as possible I yelled "I BROKE MY FUCKING ANKLE". The coach told me to stop cursing and made me walk to the bench by myself. My mother who was making her way down to the court immediately turned around and sat back down when i said it. The coaches were not happy. I had to run a mile before and after each practice for the rest of the year. Yes, that's right, it was just a sprain. Fun times though because I eventually went off on the head varsity coach about getting fired from previous jobs for inappropriate relationships with students.
3. Fucking hated that guy and the useless ass jv coach who made me lay there. Later on, we'll call this jv coach eric, just after my father had died eric was in charge of the linemen workouts for the time being because our line coach had left but hadn't been replaced yet. So naturally I weigh about 340 at that point and it's time for pull ups which i have never been able to do, but he said try so fuck it, whatever. I try, and by try I mean i did some pull ups with as little weight on the ground as possible. still, i was struggling because of the obvious. so this dude starts laughing at my attempted pull ups. obviously i have an anger problem so i get up in his face and we have a shouting match for a good 15 minutes, and i just lay into this dude about being a preacher while fucking students, obsessively lying, and treating everyone like shit. a few days later the AD/HFBC, we'll call him Johnny Wright, comes up to me and tells me i'm no longer allowed in the sports program for throwing around racial slurs, which i did not do and had many witnesses supporting me, including multiple black guys. so my soph year was the last year i played any sports other than golf and that's something Wright had nothing to do with so it didn't matter. Years later eric admitted he made up all of the supposed racial slurs i was yelling. I've always wondered how my life would be different had that not happened, but there's not much that can be done about it now.
4. i broke a bone during the only snap of varsity football i played
5. played a golf tournament once with a double par limit. my team shot about 10 under double par
6. 99% of my hits in baseball/softball land between 2nd base and CF
7. I've been kicked out of multiple golf tournaments for cursing and throwing clubs
8. not a sport at all but i legit cried when i lost a scholars bowl competition by being the lowest scoring team in a three way tie. 4 years in a row. except when we had to play hoover and got completely obliterated.
I'm sure there are many more but that's just off the top of my head.
2. was playing basketball in high school against Haleyville (fuck winston county). they had a center who was about 5'10" 265 but that's not really important other than he was fat as shit. So i go up to grab a rebound and i land on this fatass's foot and break my ankle. My coach came out onto the floor to check on me (naturally) and asked what was hurting. And, as loud as possible I yelled "I BROKE MY FUCKING ANKLE". The coach told me to stop cursing and made me walk to the bench by myself. My mother who was making her way down to the court immediately turned around and sat back down when i said it. The coaches were not happy. I had to run a mile before and after each practice for the rest of the year. Yes, that's right, it was just a sprain. Fun times though because I eventually went off on the head varsity coach about getting fired from previous jobs for inappropriate relationships with students.
3. Fucking hated that guy and the useless ass jv coach who made me lay there. Later on, we'll call this jv coach eric, just after my father had died eric was in charge of the linemen workouts for the time being because our line coach had left but hadn't been replaced yet. So naturally I weigh about 340 at that point and it's time for pull ups which i have never been able to do, but he said try so fuck it, whatever. I try, and by try I mean i did some pull ups with as little weight on the ground as possible. still, i was struggling because of the obvious. so this dude starts laughing at my attempted pull ups. obviously i have an anger problem so i get up in his face and we have a shouting match for a good 15 minutes, and i just lay into this dude about being a preacher while fucking students, obsessively lying, and treating everyone like shit. a few days later the AD/HFBC, we'll call him Johnny Wright, comes up to me and tells me i'm no longer allowed in the sports program for throwing around racial slurs, which i did not do and had many witnesses supporting me, including multiple black guys. so my soph year was the last year i played any sports other than golf and that's something Wright had nothing to do with so it didn't matter. Years later eric admitted he made up all of the supposed racial slurs i was yelling. I've always wondered how my life would be different had that not happened, but there's not much that can be done about it now.
4. i broke a bone during the only snap of varsity football i played
5. played a golf tournament once with a double par limit. my team shot about 10 under double par
6. 99% of my hits in baseball/softball land between 2nd base and CF
7. I've been kicked out of multiple golf tournaments for cursing and throwing clubs
8. not a sport at all but i legit cried when i lost a scholars bowl competition by being the lowest scoring team in a three way tie. 4 years in a row. except when we had to play hoover and got completely obliterated.
I'm sure there are many more but that's just off the top of my head.
